While it’s nice to have good friends, it’s not great to be just friends with someone that you’d rather be more than friends with. However, for many people in college or who are dating age, be it male and female alike, it’s so easy to get stuck in the “friend zone” and not know how to take things to the next level. And although taking a friendship to a romantic relationship doesn’t always work, you’ll never truly know unless you try. So to help you learn both subtle and bold ways to get past this hurdle, here are three tips for moving out of the friend zone.
Get Some Power In The Relationship
One reason you might feel stuck in the friend zone is because you simply don’t know how invested the other person is in your relationship, be it as friends or in a more romantic way. To gauge this level, Jeremy Nicholson, a contributor to Psychology Today, recommends that you gain a little more power in the relationship. You can do this by becoming less interested in maintaining the relationship, making yourself more scarce to the other person, or creating some competition around yourself. Once the balance of power is more even, you may feel more confident about your ability to take things to the next level.
Feel Out The Situation
Before you take a big plunge that could put your friendship in danger, Clare Austen, a contributor to Men’s Fitness, recommends that you try dropping some hints that will help you feel the situation out. You may try talking about a hypothetical romantic relationship the two of you may have together. Their reaction to you talking this way could give you a better idea of where you actually stand with them regarding being a couple. Austen also suggests watching the movie When Harry Met Sally and then talking about how they feel about men and women actually being friends or if one party is always attracted to the other. The information you gain from these little hints could help you a lot.
Make Your Feelings Known
If you’ve done the above steps and still aren’t sure if you’re still in the friend zone or not, it now might be time for you to be direct and make your feelings known. When doing this, Susan Winter, a contributor to the Huffington Post, writes that you should try the monologue approach. This means that you say what you need to say without waiting to hear what the other person thinks or feels about what you’re saying. This will give you the chance to get your true feelings out in the open without having to censor yourself based off what the other person does or doesn’t say. And once this has happened, you can then know for sure if this friendship will ever turn into something more.
If you’re unsure about how to move out of the friend zone, consider using some of the tips mentioned above to help you progress past this.