How many times have you been on a first date with someone you really like and you’re anxious to get to know them? You both exchange small talk, coy smiles, and laugh over some cheesy jokes. At the end of the evening you both leave thinking ‘what a perfect night!’
Did you really get to know each other? Small talk is great but here are four things a person won’t share with you on a first date.
4. “I Believe in…”
Most people will not come out and tell you what their ideals are, how their relationship with their family is, or how they see themselves. They could be a Republican and you a Democrat, they could believe in the death penalty and you’re 100% against it, or you love to recycle and they couldn’t care less about the environment. Believe or not those little things have the potential to drive you insane if you aren’t willing to accept their views and make compromises. When you’re in that date setting, don’t get swept away with those butterflies in your stomach, be sure you ask what they like, what activities they participate in, and what their ideal day would be. These questions allow you to get information without seeming like you’ve got the spotlight on them.
2. “I Have Children.”
Have you seen Facebook lately? Lots of people have their sonograms and/or babies as their profile pictures. It seems that pregnancy is on the rise and with that being the case we all know that, “Hey I have a child or two or three” usually isn’t first date material. So before you go out with someone, ask around. Ask your friends if they know him/her, or if you must Facebook stalk.
3. “I Have Psychosis.”
On that first date most people will not reveal their emotional crazy. You will see the best version of that person, looking good, and let’s face it – with the intimate setting, the focus isn’t on noticing little tell-tale signs of craziness, but on how gorgeous he/she is, and how you’re excited to be out and away from papers, exams, and professors. Try looking for how the person treats the waiter, if they seem to be paying attention to what you’re saying, how they treat other people in the area, see how they want to pay, all of these are signs that give you insight into how they will behave.
4. “I Have an STD.”
So many people in college have come across an ugly unwanted STD. It’s embarrassing and something that most people don’t want to admit. It’s can mean dating suicide if the word gets out so most people will deny or hide the fact they have had the Clap or Crabs, etc… Furthermore, before you go for that kiss on that first date think about who this person has possibly been with or what they’ve possibly done, do you really want your lips on theirs, or do you want to hold their hand? When you’re going to dinner and when you’ve been seated tell your date you’re going to wash your hands see if they follow suit, if they don’t maybe you want to reconsider holding their hands.
These are four ways to protect yourself from dating someone that could potentially leave you a victim of “pseudo-love”. It’s up to you to do your homework when it comes to dating! Enjoy!