4/21: The Day After (Non-Method Man Edition)

January082006004.jpg image by fischer_matthews2

Let’s be realistic about this: You probably woke up at noon today, high off your ass and not looking to do any work besides cleaning (or for the true pothead, smoking) the resin out of your bowl. But the great thing about weed hangovers is that you won’t be in a bad mood about this and an even greater thing is the lazy segue back into normal life The Campus Socialite has cooked up. It’s a 3 step, 24 hour detox, man.

1. Breakfast

Who cares if it’s not morning anymore? You need some good pothead food to start your day. Today’s a day to eat unhealthy, maybe relive your childhood a little bit. Grab that box of Cookie Crisp, down some Lucky Charms, or go for some Froot Loops. Quick, easy, goes great with coffee.

2. Getting Out Of Work (Or At Least Going In Late)

You’re probably thinking, “No. Come on, I can’t do that.” Oh yes you can! All it takes is a phone call and a non-descript yet very specific symptom: “I’m having trouble breathing today.” See, the weed gods really thought this 4/20 thing through. It’s right at the start of allergy season, typically the time when asthma symptoms are at their worst. Besides, if you smoked your brains out the day before, you’re technically not lying. You’re just not giving the real reason. And for those people who work mornings and probably slept way past the reasonable time to call out, here’s how you get your ass out of no-call, no-show territory tomorrow (or for the particularly annoying boss, during the cell phone call he will inevitably make later on in the day): “I couldn’t breathe so how was I supposed to talk to you about it?” Put the monkey on his back. He’s ruining your post-high, man.

3. “Cool-down” Period AKA The Rest Of The Day

Now that you’ve got all your responsibilities out of the way, you’re in the clear. It’s time to live out the polar opposite of Carpe Diem: Chilling the fuck out. Pop Half-Baked into the DVD player (it’s the most work I’ll ask you to do. I promise), lay down and just chill. Substitute Half-Baked for Weeds, Californication, Old School or whatever the hell you feel like watching. No cooking for you today. Have your other meals delivered. Get some friends over and chill out together. We all need support systems when recovering from the 8 ounces of weed in our systems. You’ve also got a lot of time to think… about what you’ll do for next year’s 4/20. Watch this vid for inspiration!

3 ft street cone bong!!! | MySpace Video

Tags : 4/204/20 WeedDetoxMarch MadnessMethod ManWeed Gods