By: The Campus Diva
Thursday is meant for all members of our clueless male audience at The Campus Socialite. We are proud to debut the “Ask The Campus Diva” column where I will field questions from our loyal readers and act as your gorgeous and knowledgeable female tour guide through some of the tough, hard-hitting issues that every man ponders when dealing with the opposite sex. No topic is off-limits here as I have heard it all… if you don’t believe me, just read on. So without further ado, I present to you all the first installment of “Ask The Campus Diva.”
Is chest hair a turn off?
No way Jose. Contrary to what most men would think, chest hair is hot. I don’t want to be with a boy, I want to be with a man. I understand this is clearly not the case with my fabulous vagina from a male’s perspective, but I’m telling you shaving is a no-no. I can deal with rug burn on my face since I’m a huge fan of the male’s facial scruff, but I’d rather not have a brillo pad rub my torso while in action.
What is more important, having a guy with a “black cock” (figuratively speaking) or a black card?
Honestly, it’s all about how you use what you got. Will a dirt-poor dude with a small ass penis turn me on? No, not at all. To me, it’s more about confidence in the bedroom and potential in the leather office chair. I want to know that you are ready to please me. Foreplay is important guys. I could probably write an entire article about it and how too many guys skip this step and go right for my warm apple pie. Yes, there are always times when we’re both so horny we just can’t control jumping each others bones, but unlike men who literally get turned on when anything that lives and breathes touches their penis or a woman minding her own business is eating a banana across the room, women require more effort emotionally and from their partners hand/mouth coordination with their entire body. We’re not gonna say “OMG, fuck me right here and now” if you caress two watermelons in the supermarket. The more attention you pay to turning me on (teasing, a massage, neck, boobs – you get the point…) the less I’ll be concerned with the size of your package. Regarding this money topic, we know the owner of a black card for 99% of all college kids is their parents. Although family wealth is a turn on, a 21-year-old throwing money in my face is lame and obnoxious. It’s more about the potential and what you want to be than current financial status. Stay classy, pay for the first few dates and cabs. “Just because” presents are always fun too.
Once in the friend zone, how do we get out?
Hahaha. There are five scenarios in a man/woman friendship. 1) No sexual tension whatsoever and it’s clear you are not each other’s types 2) You’ve already had sex and now have a “been there” attitude or 3) One is totally interested in the other and it’s not reciprocated. There’s a grayish area for 4 and 5 being either 4) For some strange reason you really are JUST friends and the other being 5) If you’re both secretly interested in each other, which equates to an easy solution to your question. Guys, it depends on what you’re looking for and be intelligent as to reading the signs of the other party. Also use your brain, not your penis. If you play your cards right, you can have your friend and eat her too.
Need advice from the Campus Diva? Ask away in our comments section below and join me next Thursday to see my answers to all of your burning questions.