Even newspapers and magazines are getting down with list posts these days. A few months back GQ, one my personal favorites, compiled an awesome list of the Worst Sports Fans in America, with Philly (of course) winning the highest honors. This time GQ has decided to take their talents to the college space, and ranking the Top 10 Douchiest Colleges in America. So who is the Douchiest College in America. None other than Ivy League poser, Cornell University. Check out more and the full Top 10 after the jump.
Cornell gets the honor, mostly it seems for being the Ivy League School that no Ivy League Caliber student wants to go to. I guess I shouldn’t talk. After all, I went to New Paltz (Heard of it?). But still, the idea of an entire of nation of students whining and drinking their sorrows away because they couldn’t get into Harvard is pretty funny. The Ivy League School with no Presidential Alumni, Cornell has a big fat chip on it’s shoulder, and it students make no effort what so ever to conceal it. Picture that kid you know who gets into fights every time you go out because he’s been 5’3″ since 8th grade…times 20,000.
Lucky for us one of our Interns is not only a whiny pain in the as, but actually hones his skills at Cornell University, currently. His name is Nick Tobin and you may have even read a couple of his articles on our site. This is what Nick had to say: “When I’m surrounded by spoiled private school kids everywhere I go. I’m not surprised.” There you have it folks. After making this statement, Nick proceeded to lock himself in the bathroom, where he spends most of his days. The muffled sounds of sobbing and crumpling paper could be heard three doors away. Just kidding, we love you Nick.
Ranking it at #2 and #3 were Penn State and Yale, respectively. Penn State of course, because it’s entire reputation is grounded in it’s football, tailgate, and frat boy expertise. And because it’s the dumb Pennsylvania resident’s alternative to University of Penn, and the slightly smarter New Yorker’s alternative to Albany. Yale on the other hand, is the school for corporate America to send their sub-par averaged yet well-connected children, to make them feel extra special. With enough luck, their kids will become president and use their political leverage to continue the fight of thwarting green energy and keeping minorities from climbing too high on the socioeconomic ladder. Both well earned titles of Douchiness for two very Douchey schools. The entire Top 10 is right below, and you can read the article itself on GQ.com. If you go to any of these schools, dreadfully sorry to have offended you…Douchebag.
1o. University of Florida
Main Reasons: Located in Florida, Tim Tebow.
9. MIT
Main Reasons: Empowered Nerds, Newly Indoctrinated Indie Status, Trolls.
8. University of Delaware
Main Reasons: Large College, Mediocre Sports, No Taxes.
7. Bennington College
Main Reasons: Hipsters with Money, Hipsters.
6. Brigham Young
Main Reasons: Aryan Race, Mormons.
5. Pepperdine
Main Reasons: Hot Girls, No Sex.
4. Stanford
Main Reasons: Flip Flops, Old Gap Jeans, 17,000 Facebook Friends.
3. Yale
Main Reason: Skull and Bones, basically every President ever.
2. Penn State
Main Reason: Over Emphasis on Football, even more Emphasis on Tailgating.
1. Cornell
Main Reason: Harvard Cast-offs, Andy from The Office
