By: Anonymous (Penn State University)
Ah, spring break–the time of year that millions of college kids head south for some liver-pickling boozcation. It as if everyone needs a fresh excuse to hammer beer bongs, slurp body shots, and drink until the wee hours of the morning because the action on campus is just not cutting it.
Universities across the nation are embarking on the week of spring break (some have already had it, others are impatiently waiting). Many of the students have been able to stash away enough money throughout the year to vacation somewhere gorgeous! Others have dicked away all their cash at the bars and late night fat-stops and then have no money left for island drinking. Either way–no matter where–spring break will always hold the potential to be the time of your life. Everyone has their own plans: Cancun, Panama, Miami, Dominican Republic, to name a few. But for the less-fortunate who fit into that second category, there are college-budget-friendly options! Here are few choices so you don’t have to stick around campus with the Asians and athletes!
- C’mon folks, it is America. I highly doubt there are any colleges in the country that are more than a day-trip away from a high profile city or some cool attraction. (Even if it’s the world’s largest ball of string) Find some pals, pick a place a few hours away and go! The drive itself will be worth the trip, I promise.
ROAD TRIP (without the road)
- You have to know what I mean by this. Get your hands on some magic mushrooms or another type of CIA-introduced hallucinogenic. (be safe, and don’t go overboard—especially if its your first time) With the proper guidance and research, it is guaranteed to be the most memorable spring break without ever leaving the comfort of your couch. (Because your ass will not be going anywhere else!)
- Cheap and available. There are campgrounds and state game lands all around the states. Pitch a tent, chug some beers, and tell some whore stories around a campfire! It will definitely be better than sitting on your parents couch for the remainder of break!
If these options don’t work for you grab a six pack of Dos Equis, pack a bowl of Mexican Kush (the Hispanic goods will help you feel like your out of the country, instead of being stuck in the dorms) and enjoy a few of these videos. At all costs, enjoy the hell out of your spring break!!