It’s that time of year. The most prestigious list in all of Hot-Girl-itude has been released: The Maxim Hot 100 2011! The list is always “controversial” but this year’s list featured big changes, and some major bombshells. This year’s new Queen of Hot is Rosie Huntington Whiteley, a new addition to the list, and very deserving. Her placement is up for debate, but there’s no doubt, Rosie is hot (see above picture). The rest of the list? Check out The Campus Socialite’s official analysis of The Maxim Hot 100 2011 after the jump. Pictures included!
I’m ashamed to say it, but I’ve actually never heard of this year’s champion until today. Please forgive me Rosie. For those as ignorant as myself, here’s a little background. Rosie Huntington Whiteley is a Victoria’s Secret Model. Is she the hottest Victoria’s Secret Model, I don’t know? Personally, I’m a Miranda Kerr guy (more on that later). However, rumor has it that Rosie Huntington Whiteley will be replacing the lusciously bad-ass Megan Fox as the new token hot chic in the Transformers series. Whether or not Whitely can actually act remains to be seen, but few can in Michael Bay movies, and if she’s anywhere near as hot as Megan Fox was in 1 and 2, then I’ll be eating my words for ever challenging her crown.
Speaking of Megan Fox, the Jerk-Off Queen of 4 years ago took a considerable plunge all the way to 17. Blasphemy? I suppose it doesn’t help her that she hasn’t been in a good movie in a very long time, but let’s be honest here, was she ever? Scarlett Johansson also took a considerable drop from last years top 10, all the way down (hehe) to 14. Ok, maybe that isn’t all the way down, but as far as I can tell, Scarlett being single has only made her hotter. Kim Kardashian also dropped from the Top 10 to a modest 35. Courtney didn’t even make the list. As for last year’s champ Katy Perry, she moved two sports down to number 3. Don’t think she can go much lower than that.
Obviously there were notable drops, but in my opinion, this year’s big story was comebacks. The last time I saw Natalie Portman on this list, she was still growing her hair back after V for Vendetta. Now she’s preggers, an Academy Award Winning Best Actress, and ranking in at number 8. Well deserved miss Portman. In other comeback news, none other than serial come-backer Britney Spears is back at number 25. Pretty good for once appearing in photos overweight, bald, and attacking a car with an oversized umbrella. Her contemporary Christina Auguilera is at number 58, gracious, as anyone who saw her Super Bowl performance knows.
Lastly, this year featured some new faces, and some notably absent ones as well. Co-star of everyone’s favorite reality show, JWOWW is on the list for the first time at number 78. Really? I would rather fuck Snooki than JWOWW. OK, maybe not, but come on. Watching a girl speak in detail about a clogged toilet for 10 episodes straight doesn’t exactly get me hard. Other notable newbies are Hometown Hottie Melanie Iglesias (Woo), and Eastbound and Down’s Ana De La Reguera (Olay!).
As for the exclusions, the fact that Miranda Kerr is not on a list that features JWOWW is beyond understanding. If those two were in a room together and I had two loads to bust, I would fuck Miranda twice. I’m guessing there was some kind of political motive (Kerr has been featured in GQ multiple times) and that is truly a shame. The biggest disappointment though is that they couldn’t find a spot for Lucie Pinder or Rosie Jones (pictured above). Do some research Maxim, because if those two don’t belong on a Hot list, I don’t know who does. Who’s with me Socialites?