Apparently people who drink crap beer weren’t happy enough with the 4.2% alcohol that you get with regular Bud Light or the 5% for Budweiser, so now there’s a nonsensical new version of America’s favorite stuffty beer called Bud Light Platinum, and it comes with a slightly heftier 6% alcohol content. Oooooh, that’s awfully noble of you Anheuser-Busch.