I feel like a guru on this issue so it is only fair for me to share my expertise with you. Some of you Campus Socialites will have relationships, and some of those relationships won’t work, but since a true Campus Socialite is no quitter, you will try various ways to keep from breaking up. One notorious way is the “break.” A nightmare to women, and what seems like a grand old idea to men. If you want a break to be successful and not end up just becoming a break up, you need to lay down the ground rules.
Now don’t think the “break” is a fictional idea or just a way for the guy to take some time banging other girls… it is not. In most cases, a break can be a useful device to calm things down, think about problems, rekindle that flame the was once there. Absence makes the heart grow fonder so a little break might do your relationship some good. Here are some instructions to follow when entering said “break.”
1. Discuss the Reasons for the “Break”
A break will do you no good if you both aren’t clear on the reasons for the break. The purpose of a break is to reflect upon the things you have done wrong or could do better to create a healthier relationship environment. Guys, think of your relationship as a professional sports team. Your team had a rough season and now it’s the offseason (the break). What do teams do during the offseason? They reflect on the past year and try to make moves and figure out ways to improve the team for the next season. It is the same with a relationship. A valuable break is one in which both parties take time apart to reflect upon the relationship and come up with ways to make it better. ** Key factor** It is not just the other person’s fault, take a good hard look at what you’re doing in this relationship and make a few changes, I bet it will help. If you can’t find anything that you’re doing wrong, come talk to me and I guarantee I’ll point out a few missteps on your part and, like a true Campus Socialite, I won’t pull any punches.
Now, you might be asking yourself what are the reasons why people actually go on breaks. Well here are some of the most common issues:
-Things are moving too fast: Some people just need to take a step back and review what they’re getting themselves into.
-Things are moving too slow: Some people just need to consider if this shit is really worth the effort (No dude wants a prude).
-Things are getting mundane: There’s no better part of a relationship then the beginning, seeing what positions she likes and pushing the envelope to see what you can get away with. However, when that all runs out you need to spice things up a bit. There are many resources to keep things interesting and I will be sure to fill you in on some of them.
-The Chemistry is Gone: Sorry to say but it happens, at this point a “break” is about all that can really help a relationship in this danger zone. Because the truth is, if you both don’t work this issue out someone else is going to step in and do the job for you. No chemistry equals a wandering eye.
-Constant Fighting: ‘Nuff Said.
-You Feel Smothered: She is clingy, he is needy, you both are on top of each other every second, he has to lie to you just go to a fantasy football draft with his friends, she isn’t allowed out with her friends without ten calls from him to see if guys are around, he can’t even get in a nice tug to Tube8.com because she’s around all the time, are you noticing a pattern here?Whatever the case may be this is a perfect reason in my mind for a much needed break. Just let your partner know clearly that the break is only because you need some space and you want the relationship to flourish, not die. (and so you don’t lose your freakin’ mind).
-Your Sexually Incompatible: One likes it rough the other wants to always make love, or maybe you like it nice and calm, and you end up with a black eye and scratches down your back. Some people are very open with their sexuality and some are insecure. Guys, here is an initial test so you don’t waste 6 months: The Doggy Style Test. Simply flip your woman doggy during one of your first sexual encounters, if shes down for the cause, it means she is generally a little more confident in her sexuality. If they’re not really up for it then you might have to either put in some work on this one or cope with the fact that you have a dead starfish on your hands.
-Your Friends Have Pointed Out That You’re Miserable Lately: Your friends will usually be the first ones to fill your head with the take a break stuff, especially if they are single. Take what they say with a grain a salt, but if they’re constantly pointing out how miserable you have become then I am sure there is some merit behind it.. it might be time for a break.
2. Make Sure Your Both Clear on The Acceptable Behavior for the “Break”
No matter what you both decide, you need to be on the same page with the “break” rules. If one of you think this is your chance to nail some unfinished business, and the other is just taking the time to think things through and not hooking up at all, you will get back together with more problems then you had before the break. If you both decide to be single for a while that is fine as well, risky, but might be needed at times. More often the “break” rules are that you spend some time with your friends and by yourself and then when you’re both ready, you get back together. Sometimes you just can’t hold out and need to have sex ASAP and then you get back together for physical reasons.
3. Stick To The Rules
If you really plan on getting back with your partner after the break is finished, then stick to the rules. If you both decide not to hook up, don’t start hitting up all your throwback booty calls the next night. If your going to do that, then just call the break what it is…a break up.
My final words on the “break” are don’t be afraid of the break, embrace it. If properly executed it can transform your relationship into something great, or it will allow you to come to the realization that this relationship is not for you and you want to go in another direction. Either way the point is to gain clarity. And there is nothing better then make-up from “Break” Sex. Write that down….