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By Paige Fagan (Buffalo State College)

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I have been to my share of house parties, not to mention I am in a sorority, so I have hosted my share of parties as well. There is a fine line between common sense and just making an ass out of yourself. For example, if no one in the house is smoking a cigarette and you clearly see everyone is out on the porch….GO OUT ON THE PORCH! When the owner of the house asks you not to smoke…do not flip out like a crazy drunk and start screaming, you’re only embarrassing yourself.

Next, do not bring someone to a party that you barely know then leave them throwing up into a couch that does not belong to you. Want to know why? Their shoes will be stolen off their feet in the middle of the night. Even though this is very funny, some dangerous truth lies in this. If something happened to this boy who was left by two “friends,” all consequences go to the people who live in this house (my friends). Not cool, and not classy. Know how to handle your alcohol!

Next, do not fall asleep with your shoes on. If you do, you will most likely become a canvas for someone’s art work…and we are not talking classy artwork, we are talking genitals on your face in black marker. When you wake up and realize what’s happening…do not say your shoes were off because chances are someone took a picture, yet another situation where you are just embarrassing yourself.

For all my ladies out there…do not set your drink down. True story, I set my drink down once, and a pill fell into my mouth before dissolving. Do not be naïve this was at a frat party. On this note, DO use the buddy system even if you’re just going to the bathroom.

Another important don’t to watch out for…breaking things. Don’t punch holes in the wall, or shut a glass door on someone’s hand, or shatter a picture or lamp. Definitely do not start breaking bottles of beer or liquor, one of these things may very well send you to the hospital…I’ve seen it and I’m sure you have too.

Not common, but has happened; do not set things on fire… including people. Neighbors will call the police and fire department. Not to mention this is probably one of the most unsafe things you could ever do.

Just a few more pointers for the road – do not take one shot of Southern Comfort a minute…you will fall on your face. Do not lay on the floor in the bathroom flailing your arms around…first of all EW GERMS, second just plain sloppy. Last but not least, after the party DO NOT get into a car, I’m sure you already know why.

Tags : College PartyFiregermsHouse PartyPartyingpassing outpassing out with your shoes onPukeroofiessharpiessouthern comfortwhat not to do?
Meatloaf

The author Meatloaf

Meatloaf is a music and technology enthusiast that tries to make it to as many festivals and concerts as possible.

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