It is one of the most important questions to ever plague mankind. Which one of these beautiful women wears the name they both share, better? In order to get to the bottom of this, we need to investigate and compare every aspect of their lives and come to a logical and reasonable conclusion. So, with that being said, let’s get down to the nitty-gritty and solve this mystery.
It should go without saying, but just to keep you from getting confused, Longoria is always going to be on the left, and Mendes on the right.
Both of these women are so damn beautiful. It’s hard for me to look at their faces and have to make a ruling that one is better than the other. I wonder what a genetically-engineered combination of both of them would look like: She’d probably be really hot, but there’s always the small chance that she’d be fugly.
So who has the hotter face? Eva Longoria has softer features, thus she has the all-important “cute” factor; I just want to bring her home to meet my mom and dad and cuddle her all night. But Eva Mendes is more exotic, and has a raging case of Dick Sucking Lips. She’s definitely the kind of girl you want to show off to your friends once or twice, just to prove that you sexed her up.
Can I just call it a tie?
Look at that cleavage. Well, judging solely by shadows, I’d have to say that Mendes definitely takes this category. Of course it’s a comparison of outdoors (Longoria) to indoors (Mendes), and lighting certainly matters, but Eva Mendes’ twins just pop more. This is especially mind-blowing considering that she isn’t even wearing a bra. You could say that she’s supporting them with her arms, but her relaxed stance makes me think otherwise. Although I enjoy staring at both pairs of breastices in front of me, I have to declare Eva Mendes the winner here.
This is my favorite part. I’d definitely classify myself as an ass-man, and both of these women are packing heat in that department. I can’t tell you how badly I want to pick Eva Mendes just because of how naughty that picture is, especially when compared to Eva Longoria’s fairly conservative rear-end.
But I’m all about a fair competition, and both of these ladies are working with some solid junk. The problem is that while Eva Longoria could possibly have the better tush, I can’t really see it through those undies. Meanwhile, I can literally analyze every crevice of Eva Mendes’ badonkadonk, and every part of it looks perfect. So I’m going to have to give her another win.
Last Leg of the Race
My god. I enjoy a good, firm butt, but nice legs are second-to-none. In both cases, those heels accentuate the fuck out of those shapely limbs. There isn’t much to be said here. Both sets of legs are delicious enough to eat, but there’s something about Eva Longoria’s lower body that just keeps me looking. The toned skin, great foot placement, and revealing mini-skirt come together to send me into leggy nirvana. So, in this case, Longoria takes the prize, but I want to make it clear that I would take either pair of legs, and their respective body, in an instant.
The Complete Picture
So now let’s examine the whole package. Both tasty women are packing extreme levels of hotness, but there is an obvious winner. I have to say that when I started writing and researching for this article, I was sure that Eva Mendes was going to blow Eva Longoria out of the water. Now, at the very end of the journey, I have a deeper appreciation for the Desperate Housewife, because she certainly is smokin’ hot. I mean, look at that picture…she is just asking for it.
But sadly, Longoria is not our winner, even though she put up one hell of a fight. Eva Mendes has a ridiculous amount of sex appeal that her opponent just couldn’t match. And it’s for that reason that I declare her to be the Ultimate Eva: Congrats Eva Mendes, you can now wear your name in pride, knowing that no other Eva can live up to your standard!