You may have already heard this elsewhere, but everyone else is just posting hot pictures and playing it off like no big deal. Well, this is a very big deal to us. When one of our favorite famous ladies declares her love of scissoring, we find ourselves in a very paradoxical situation. Is this good news or bad news? Let’s analyze what’s up and figure out our own thoughts on the matter.
Good News: Amber Heard is a Lesbian
Right out of the gate, I have to say I have no idea how this awesome factoid slipped by us. I’m not one to miss out on sexy female celebs coming out of the closet.
That being said, we love lesbians, and now one the hottest actresses in the world is among their ranks. Amber can easily displace the complete non-boner that I get from both Ellen DeGeneres and Rosie O’Donnell.
The blonde bombshell is currently dating equally sexy photographer Tasya van Ree, hence all the artistic pictures. We already have our fingers crossed for a lesbian sex tape, a la Tila Tequila style. We all want to see what the couple does behind closed doors…but we all want to participate as well, and therein lies the problem.
Bad News: Amber Heard is a Lesbian
Yes guys, not only is Amber Heard off the market, but she’s not interested in taking your dick. That’s two strikes against all of us dudes. We’re basically fucked on this one – and not in the good way – so let’s just shoot for other crazy hot actresses and hope that one day Amber grows out of her lesbrotronic phase and comes back to the straight side. Hope hope hope.