So TMZ and a bunch of other news outlets have reported that everyone’s favorite 80’s Hot Girl layover, Demi Moore had a seizure at her house the other night, causing the paramedics to be called. Is she Epileptic? Nope. Turns out the cougar who’s practically your mother’s age was huffing aerosol cans like she was 18 at a Phish show. She was rushed to the hospital from her house and is now checked into rehab for ” stress and exhaustion.” Also known as too many Whip-Its and pain killers.
Moore has backed out of her role in the upcoming film Lovelace about porn star Linda Lovelace (deepthroat). Pity. It’s a good thing however that Amanda Seyfried was the only actually starring as Linda Lovelace and probably the one carrying the bulk of the aesthetic appeal. An almost 50 Demi Moore still beats 75% of the 19-year-olds in your Psych 102 class, but I think we can live.
I haven’t really been paying too much attention to this but supposedly her and Ashton Kutcher are getting divorced after a 6-year marriage because he ran out and banged a bunch of younger chicks. I don’t think anyone is extremely surprised. Of course, we can’t blame Demi for going on a little bender in the midst of a divorce but whatever happened to a good old-fashioned coke and alcohol. Does a 50-year old who’s still raking in royalty checks from Striptease really need to be huffing Whip Cream cans for a fix? Still looks good though. Maybe to spite Ashton she’ll go even younger, like let’s say, a 23-year-old intern/bartender?? Just sayin.